Parker Owens

"'Wow I sure do love men' - Parker, 2020" "'I do love sexually harassing little boys' - Parker, 2020" "'I already have worms' - Parker, 2020" "'Fart' - Parker, 2020"

Backstory
Parker was an accidental birth conceived from two muscular prisoners in Guantanamo Bay prison.

n the island of Cuba. Parker is a rare phenomenon as he is the only child ever to be born from a man. Don't ask how you already know, it probably wasn't fun.

Immigration from Cuba
Parker lived a mostly quiet life in the Guantanamo Bay prison cafeteria, where he would roll around in Mashed Potatoes in such as well as eating mice from the floor. Eventually he was caught and sent to Havana Cuba, because they ignored the fact he was technically born in America. In Havana around the age of 9 Parker got onto a raft full of immigrants escaping Cuba. Eventually Parker would arrive in Miami as all good Cuban immigrants do.

Life in America
Parker soon got pretty tired of having bright neon lights flashed in his face in Miami and personally walked all the way north to Pennsylvania.

Stealth Mission
Parker was not originally a fella, Parker was just your average student but he eventually planned out a sneak integration into the fellas group. Parker just one day started sitting at the table with the fellas and no one really cared.

Later Life
Later in Parker's life in America he got married in club penguin. Parker as well decided to adopt a real life Anime girl, of course to Emory's repent.

Fame
Parker would eventually take his enthusiasm for big tiddy anime girls to the next level, becoming a professional critic. Parker would even become so famous for this that he would receive work in progress hentai's all the way from Japan to view. A privilege of this fame is that he got access to every hentai ever completely uncensored. We aren't sure what his daughter thought of his career but it's safe to assume it was probably a bit of an awkward topic.

Death
Once Parker was noticeably aging he wanted to make a bucket list to work on, one of his wishes was to go skydiving. This turned out very poorly. His parachute didn't fail or anything like that, he just got hit by a whole commercial jet plane while descending in the stratosphere.

Extra Info
Parker only ever has too much hair or is completely bald.

Parker is actually short for Pallahrker.

Parker has hair color dysphoria.